Friday, December 18, 2009

THE THEORY OF TIGER WOODS SYNDROME


DONT CLOSE THE DARWAJOH
BY UNCLE BHAI GORA

What is the TIGER WOODS THEORY.....Well obvious reasons its got to do with extreme cheating, probably Golfing or maybe even probably putting hole by hole or maybe finishing the 13 holes out of the 18.
UBG says what Tiger is experiencing is not abnormal or out of the ordinary.....Its actually a phenomina that most of the bitcharos (innocent guys) experience..Its that moment that culminates when the beast inside of you is unleashed..When someone sees a side of you that they would never dare picture or imagine.
Its like a bitcharo(good owe) lighty UBG knew when he visited Uncle Salaam.The lighty doesnt say a word. His parents brand him as a deryoh destined for greatness and academic greatness, destined to be a doctor or lawyer. Then that same lighty that never says a word is at Truth Night Club on the stage with his top off and screaming..........Was this the same lighty that never said a word.
Anyway UBG says that he was enjoying batchelor hood and he remembers the one UNCLE lambasting him on how he should complete his Imaan and how a wife will change him and bring peace in his life. UBG says the UNCLE was saying stuff like "Look at that woman, She is my wife, When you make nikaah,the Bond between you and her develops, Its amazing.She is the mother of my kids.Respect her and she will respect you. She has been the pillar of my life...And that is so because I respect her and will never cheat on her.

UBG pondered and actually felt guilty. He thought maybe let me have the Wonderfull life of this Uncle.I mean he has a happy home. The best way to overcome guilt is to get a massage with a Coke and a Smile and attain Equilibrium it is   ..............
As UBG Struts out of the showers he sees the same Uncle going in for a massage and obviously meant to come out smiling....The question is what Drove this man to that point of insanity or What drove the man to the brink of being unfaithfull....Was it Nafs,Desires or even the challenge...Was it Mischief or the Devil...What makes men cheat?
Is it a belter of a chic, Is it money,Fame and Fortune.I mean look at our examples above.Two bitcharos and role model individuals.............Never tasted anything bad in their whole life. Followed the Daddy as Tiger did. Got married,Had a wholesome image and beautifull wife,a family. He was clean, he was successfull, doing well..........and then when he finally lept out of his slumber and into the fire, the facebooks,the nightclubs,the malls, the streets and he realises F#4K ME,WHAT THE F#4K,,,,,,,,,,,................I have stepped onto another planet. He goes to Sandton City in Summer...He sees badaams, He goes to Vodacom4U and gets 3G.Everybody is talking about this Facebook or F34Kbook. He sees a HOT Chic ,he clicks add friend. He updates his status and says Looking for Sex....lol...He gets poked,He pokes back......He hides from his identity in the real World..creates a ficticious profile and tells his wife that he is on the Stock Exchange...........He gets a taste of this Wonderfull Life and says Hold On.....This is f#4ken sublime.............................No one knows a thing.
He goes to play a round of Golf and 13 holes later he is busted...............He couldnt handle that mundane, boring life.Or he just never tasted Biryani before.He only ate Karee Kitchree...He feels like he is in f34kn Las Vegas and there is Woman everywhere..Play the fruit machine and get three lemons.
That is not Cheating or what leads a man to it...................
That is simply the Theory of Tiger Woods.
When you have everything,been a good boy,followed all the rules by the book,You a re let out, Get a taste of F34kn Las Vegas and then you become this Beast of a f34ken MAN..................................................
So rather go f#4k it up, Be a Warne or Gibbs and go down Blazing.

UBG OVER AND OUT

7 comments:

  1. True UBG.How true.I knew a man that got married at 19,ran the beezneez and had a great life,a good owe.Then he fell vivtim to the theory of the TIGER.Left the vrou,beeznees,good life,tod his father fuck you and he has now involved into the POP Syndrome.Power of Punani

    ReplyDelete
  2. tiger , u the man !!!!!

    "go" grab a good time go grab a wimpy burger now

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nothing Wrong Tiger,Nothing Wrong
    Maybe his wife drove him to cheat

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ah, the male perspective. wat happens to aunty bhengori who sits at home makin her own rotis for 20sumthin years to help her husband save money from the family business for their retirement cruise and then when he reaches age 55 he goes and brings biwi no 2? sad life of the typical muslim family

    ReplyDelete
  5. tiger is burning bright. all this hot scandal is inspiring for many.

    ReplyDelete
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