ASK BABOO & BENNY

Well , They coming back, The post that stirs the pot.Some find it popular, others lambast it. For those of you that dont know who Baboo and Benny is, Well they Swoosh0018 advice Columnist.

Benny is a rigid, upright liberal female who probably never ever got laid in her life. She loves politics and believes women should be leaders.

Baboo:...Well he is just a bastard

*Please if this posts offends anyone than simply scroll sown or f#4k off. These are true questions that come in from readers..And Baboo and Bhenny are real. I cannot disclose who they are

Dear B & B. Women.....They are messed up creatures. You just cant understand them. Why do they not say what they mean or mean what they say. Why must there always be a subliminal, hidden thing. Like they yell you to speak to your ex girlfriend. Then you do it and they get pissed off. And why do they store information for decades. Please Help and offer some advice?

BHENNY: Oh my word, Dont you know that you must always be sensitive to a women's needs. My god Men are so insensitive. They do it to see how loyal men are and they test to see the lengths of sacrifice that you will endure for them. When they say Go speak to your ex,They mean Dont speak to your Ex, Think about how secure they will feel if you say "No my Darling...You are my one and only, I donot wish to speak to my ex. You are the Queen of this World." Also men are such pigs that they always fail in the biggest situations. Their biggest failure arises when The Shopping question is posed to them during a big Football game. Even though they know that the Big game means Everything they just want you to say "Ok my darling. I will sacrifice this big game because and only beacuse you are the Queen of the Universe.
So you insensitive men out there....That is why woman Dont mean what they say.

BABOO: That is the most ridiculous advice I have ever heard. What s#4te is that They dont mean what they say. Damn it. If my wife or wives tell me to take out the Garbage..What the f34k does it mean. I musnt take out the garbage. In my Book if they say do something Il f#4ken do it. Let me give you an example. My wife, or my second wife an I went out to a movie once and I seen my ex girlfriend. So my wife said. "Dont be rude Baboo....Go have a chat.Its been years".Il wait in the corner." So I go up to my ex. Have a chat...."Hows married life, Hows the kids." I smile a little not to be rude. It takes me all but 5 minutes. Anyways we get into the car, and not a bloomin word from my wife. I offer her sweets from heaven and she says she is not hungry. The funny thing is she insisted we buy sweets from heaven because she hasnt had it in years. I say ok. I drive on. I look at a billboard. I say..."Thats a nice advert". She is grumpy now and says "Its ok........Ive seen better. In my mind that s the best advert in SA. I switch on the radio...She says turn it off please.My ears are sore. I say...Was it the ex?. She says "Why are you men so egotistical.Must it be always about you"

Im baffled now. I say half and hour ago I was with the happiest female in the world.After I spoke to the ex. I get this shit.

Wait its not over. I f#4kn get invited to the inlaws ten years later for a braai. After playing soccer with the boys I arrived ten minutes later. Just a measely ten minutes....And wait for it

She goes to that F#4KEN DATABASE pulls this Sandton ex girlfriend File out from the archives. And Rips me to shreds. "Oh but when you spoke to your ex in Sandton, You were full of smiles, and you moved your body, and showed her your muscles. "I mean f#4k women...You were the one that told me to speak to her. And as for the Big Soccer game...What the f#4k there is no compromise there. Do we ask them to come play Golf with us when they have a bridal shower.Fuck that

I say they must all realise that WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING YOU MUST MEAN IT. What you say readers