THE BLOG TURNS 1

Guys please send me an sms with your okes names. No Competition.

They stole my cell phone two weeks ago and I got nobodys numbers. Mombhai, Laudium owes, Azee, Zee Mayet, Seth and the likes.

Chics are welcome too......he he

Thanks Okes and Babes.

ALSO THE BLOG HAS TURNED 1 FREAKIN YEAR. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT.

Like I always said its you owes & chics that make the blog rock. So please forgive me if I miss anyone out over the year. As you get older, the memory goes.

It started exactly one year ago. I created a sports blog, emailed Azee, Hoosain Mayet, Cisse, Ebie J and Z talia. Just to see if it works. Then came Gummy, Amien Rajah,Mk and then FORZA AZURRI-MY ITALIAN WORLD CUP DIARY SENT US SPIRALING

So Thanks Gentleman for advertising,spreading the word,the Interviews and making it skit. When FHM buys us out. I will be in Camps Bay in a Jacuzzi in the Class of The ZAKARIYA ACKALWAYA MAKING A MILANO SPECIAL ON A COLD SATURDAY NIGHT

So Thanks to

Two Sugars,The first chick to grace the blog, Cisse, Hoosain Mayet, Azee Moola, Ebie Jay, Swaar, Zahier Talia, Vahzerz, Yumna Vahzerz, Faaiz Oz, Shakeerah Vahzerz, Faheem Vahzerz, Seth, Offside, Em Ay, Gummi, Mk, Amien Rajah, Zee Mayet, Waseem Koor, Baboo Wadee, Rid-1 Token, Shazo,Laudium Owes, Kamikaze Warrior, The Kirsten Family, Saleha, Zunaid Chelsea, Gori & Goolam Soogra Patel, Extremist Badat, Die Hard Man Utd Chic, Man Utd Babe, Zaheera, Aslam Khota, Zaks Durbs, Talha Loonat,His Brew Bilal, Louie, Junky Nelspruit, Gknotts, Eco, Pops, Cam, Biggy, Agent, Waseem Khan, Vis Kop Out, Naeem Fakir, Hazrat Yusuf Rasool, Yusuf Abdullah, Hashim Amla, Faiyaz Mayet "ZAM RAM", King kenny, Riyad Rustenburg and his crew. Carmen. All the Anonymous Guys, Mombhai, Kabeer Goor, Ridone Bahrain, Habib Select, Riyad Loonat, Shahir Laher, Mamoo, Schooter Bike, Tas K, Zahed Doods, The Ackalwaya's, Zubair "JET FUEL ONLY", The Dundee Owes, Fatima S, A Salejee, Ary Moosa,The Kaka's,The Punisher, Sir Ali Busby, The Kaloos, The Quwutul Saatie, Esoep Bhai Montgommery, Jozie, The other Vahzer'z.The readers I met in Sandton. To the guys I dont know, The Critics, The owes that have lambasted the Blog, Solla, Mr Jamaal, All the Delloit's Boys that read the blog, Avzee Liverpool,M Skuds, I will add more names to the pot. As I remember. Thank You. Its all of you guys that post the comments that gets us the hits.Thanks for the readership

WITHOUT ALL OF YOU THIS BLOG WOUDNT B WHAT IT IS NOW. WE NOT LARGE YET, BUT FROM WHERE WE WERE AND WHERE WE ARE, ID SAY ITS SOMETHING

Some Stats since March Last year.

425 POSTS

lekker comments

3600 hits since 15 February 2007

I must say for me personally the higlights over the year have been the Forza Azurri Journal during the World Cup, The Quote of the week "DEL PIERO BERLIN HERE WE COME", THE JIHAD,Abus vs the Alis, when a UTD babe was told to fry a samoosa during Ramadaan and she knows nothing about ball, Faheem Vahzerz constant drubbing by Seth & Azee. The Fantasy Leagues, Meeting Hashim Amla and Yusuf Abdullah, Interviewing Agent-A die Hard Man Utd fan from Old Trafford, Interviewing Aslam Khota, The lekker response when owes meet you and tell you about the Blog, The Blogs announcement on Radio 2000 by Aslam.

The comment that made us censor, ban, and rethink the babe of the week Column, Moegamet and the Jedi Mind Trick, Mehboob and the video that we battling with Copy rights from the Kaloos.

To release it will be SUBLIME. Come on Abdullah , give us the rights to publish it. Its badder than The Paris Hilton Vid.

If you owes thought any moment was SUBLIME, Put your comments. Place a comment and sign your name, So when we are Big Time One Day, ha ha. And when we old and Grey we know

THESE WERE THE REAL LEGENDS THAT SHOOK THE BLOG.........

I undertake this myself. I will present someone on the comments list or Tribute list with a Original Soccer Top of the team He Supports.If we dont get it here I will Hunt the kit down from Overseas.

THIS GESTURE IS FROM ME, MY WORD IS MY HONOUR

The draw will be done by Duhloytte and Swoosh

Cimao Conte

Alessandro Swoosh Piero

BELOW IS A VIDEO OF THE TIME THE BLOG BCAME A NAME. PLEASE WATCH WITH SOUND ALL AZURRI FANS



http://www.youtube.com/v/_pgunVc1KGU

JET FUEL ONLY

This was a good post. I dont know where that Boost Developments guy is gone. But What I plan to do is ask you owes to keep the post alive. In April I will publish 5 Picks of each owes choice. See what the owes like and keep th post alive. Im not that clued up on the technical aspect of cars. This week Ary M sent me his PICK "5" selection.

In order LTR: 2005 Brabus SLR 2)Saleen S7 Twin Turbo 3)2007 Merc Amg 4.)BMW M6 HAMAN 5. THE NEW M3

So the firsy owe that emails me his Pick 5. I will put it up weekly. Send some blinders owes.

Ramadaan is only 6 months away

IM A PROTEA-WE GOT MALINGA'D

CRICKET WORLD CUP UPDATE

What the hell happened last night. I had some tea, went for a Shower. I come out , Been used to seeing my phone just saying SA VODA. All of a sudden I see 5 messages. I get Happy right. I think who the hell is this,this time of the night Right. I see the message from Naeem laudium.


"Swoosh , We got MALINGAR'D


I see a message from Ebie J. hissing and cussing and going berserk. I look at the TV right and WE F$%KEN getting MALINGAR'D ALRIGHT



I mean the b#$tard took for consecitive wickets, Could you imagine if we had o lose by the ODD run with 18 balls to spare. F$%KING hell. I dont have much to say except that I want to hear the heavyweights views, the Kirstens included.



Graeme Smith even said on news24 that couple of the guys were seen having a smoke or two in the dressing rooms.



In the end though Lucky we had Pierterson who I dont rate as a spinner but the lad can tonk a few...... He was calm and collected.



I was at Paari hair salon last night. A Sri Lankan looking lity walked in and told Basheer Bhai He wants a hairstyle like Malinga.


Other talking points to note. Kallis came in for some heavy stick. We made him MUGG of the Week. Then the man hits a matchwinning innings last night. Do we have what it takes not to choke . Do we have the BMT. What changes or tactics should we change owes. I want to hear the views

comments last night
"Ur know sometimes you take it for granted that things are going ur way then all of a sudden the shit hits the fan and thats what you call being MALINGA'D-naeem laudium. Good one bro , if SA lost we would have made it quote of the week

"Too much swearing"(censored comment)-Ebie Jay, die hard SA Fan

MIDWEEK SOCCER ROUND UP

I had my man on the scene at Ellis Park during the SA vs Bolivia Game. Shazo was there rubbing shoulders with the likes of Danny Jordan and other big chaps in the box. So Shazo if you logging on please leave a comment and tell us how sublime it was

EURO 2008 QUALIFIERS

THREE LIONS ON A SHIRT

Azee this bA#$tard Maclaren had to go. I didnt see the game. But did he bring on Stuart Downey. For #$5ks sake the Euro will not be the same without the flutes and tin tin, tin tin tin, tin tinne ne ne,tinn tinn tin tin tin Englands Dream. Thank you for STEVIE G in what was deemed as a pathetic England first half. Biggy can you give us some view points here. What is the problem, Terry Venables and the Gaffer have now had a spat. WHAT HAS F4%KEN CHANGED. Stuggling against minnows like Andora. In what was supposed to be a relatively comfortable group. The Govee must be swearing as we speak. Azee F45K OFF.

FORZA AZURRI

A good night in Scotland and one thing my man Rashid Cassim always fones me and gives me the update. Rash called me last night when Del Piero came on. Rash also gave me the updates of the scores. But a brace from Toni and Buffon hardly threatened the Azurri who now lie in 4th place ,2 points behind Ukraine, France and Scotland. But we still have to play France at home, Ukraine and Scotland Away. Its gonna be tough, but we have the faith .

Forza Azurri

We are after all the World Chamions

Elsewhere there were other good wins for the Big boys. Germany snuck it past Ireland. The Chzechs, The Dutch as well as the Spanish registered good wins.

*Just a point. Didnt Alex Ferguson get involved with the same tannie that I know someone had Kari Kichree and Snoek Breedi with in Cape Town. There was that big thing. What is it with Sir Alex and the KAAP. Vis do you know anything about this. It is clear that Ferguson has made an attempt to sign Benni McCarthy. Bennie to Utd. Hoosain, Biggy and Co, Ur views.

I kid you not I know two owes that had Karee Kichree and Breedy and met her with the smallest fone on the market at the time. The Ericson gh337. Ferguson must have had an ipod. But they were Liverpool owes. My advisors will back this statement up

ADVERTISER WELCOME-VODACOM 4U CRESTA

The blog would officially like to Welcome Thank Yusuf Rasool from Vodacom 4U Cresta for advertising with us. In the Words of the Blog Sublime Specials and I took out my contractlast week. Thanks Joe. Top Deal you gave me and F$%ken fast I must say.

Anyway as I said If you owes & chicks are interested in Vodacom Contracts , Visit the store. In a week I think Joe The new Specials will be available and there are some top phones.

PHONE : 011 478 8606

Good Luck With Your Business Hazrat Yusuf Rasool and the blog is proud to have you advertising with us. On behalf of the Swoosh0018 commitee. We will make you the Official Vodacom Supplier of the Blog. Wen we make te Big time he he. But even now you are my Official Vodacom Supplier of the Blog.

MUGG OF THE WEEK

Guys on the blog are calling for the man to named the MUGG. Last night I was watching IMMM ARLTARF KAZEEEE E-NEWS JHB , E-TV and critics were calling for his head. Saying that he should be dropped. He was blamed and lambasted for not speeding up the proceedings against Austrailia. For slowing it down. Others say the man is pure Class and how could you blame him. He didnt do too bad. Because of bloggers decisions Kallis is called up as MUGG of the WEEK.. What was the solution though. Was Kallis not the right man to come in one Down. Maybe they should have sent Gibbs or a pinch hitter. Esoep Bhai Montgomerry told me on Sunday Zuhr time that they should have sent Abu Bakr Mark Boucher In at three and f$%k Kallis. He bloody sold us. I got a message from Hoosain saying "What is Kallis the Sanex Man up to". Biggy said the same. Ebie a Die hard SA Fan said different. Peter Kirsten said his say. But I want you owes to answer what was the solution. Smith and AB were fresh in the HUT. So was the man supposed to play aggresively or was the man suppose to steady the ship. What if he started attacking and lost his wicket.

Maybe Arthur said to Kallis "Go in there and let the others Hover Around you". This will make interesting banter and I know some comments in Cricket World Cup Update pertain to this but we had to create a special section for THE MUGG as voted by the lads on the Blog. Sorry J BUT IT HAD TO COME. But Ebie I ask you is the man deserving as THE MUGG OF THE WEEK. Mombhai as the leader of the Fantasy Cricket and a neutral. I want the heavyweights responses here.

BEST OF THE BEST FANTASY CRICKET

SUPER STRIKER AWARD

The First trophy that will be awarded is the SUPER STRIKER AWARD. The man that leads the pack after the first phase gets the Award. This is a trophy and it is sponsored by Kola All Cell by our very own Mamoo. These guys are also my ooms and they are based in Yarona Cash and Carry. They specialise in Airtime and Cell C & MTN contracts. So we have Hazrat doing the Vodacom Contracts in Cresta and a proud sponsor of the Blog and now we have Kola All Cell sponsoring the Super Striker Award.

So well Done to Mombhai Muhammed Carrim as he is THE KOLA ALL CELLULAR Super Striker award after the Group Stage, He leads the Best of The Best with a tally of 2369. Ismael from London trails him by 315 points. Well done Ismael . I see we have two poms in the Top 10.

THE TOP 10 is as follows

1. Muhammed Carim MC's Eleven 2369
2. Sir Ish Loonat Blood Clot 2054
3. Riaz Ismail Pops World 11 1945
4. Ridwaan Mayet ridszzzz 1936
5. Firaz Ahmed Tops 11 1913
6. Naseem Mayet SWOOSH'S SHARKS 1901
7. Ebrahim Ahmed Pirates of da Caribbean 1887
8. ebrahim loonat Jungli Jaanwar Barmy Army 1872
9. Yusuf Maiter The Kings 11 1850
10. ziyaad mayet Anti-OZ 1795

Also owes the World Cup is short so please whoever is outstanding on fees We will start booting owes out at the end of the Super 8's. I have left another member in charge of fees and whoever doesnt pay will be booted.The other member is the accountant of the blog and he doesnt wish to be disclosed. But you owes can leave it with Faaiz in Fordsburg.A Wear Wholesalers-next to Mona Bakery. With Cisse, in Bhamjees Sportsworld, I dont think he will mind for me this being a World Cup. My brew in Lenz-Wits Factory Shop 011 854 9681 . Or in my account. But once again the trophy is sublime....

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

I was at a braai yesterday and you know how it goes. The Toppies are braaing and having their guaais. And you know the timers, They talk more s$%t than the litis today. And Obviuosly the Bob Woolmer murder and betting was the topic of discussion.

To which one toppie said
"AY, All you b#$tards know that when there is money and Corruption Involved, There is a Indian Around. So Obviously it was the Bookies"-anonymous

VIDEO OF THE WEEK

http://www.youtube.com/v/lEMbIUBWp6k

It was 1992, In Ramadan I remember, Std 6. Coming back from Mads. Watching Barry Lambert and that cricket Song. "Who Will it be,Who will be the kings.Its a once in a liftime Chance...". After we seen this Run Out as Lities every one of us wanted to Run Someone out in this Fashion.Or me at least. As lities we were Smitten. Fielding was given a new meaning and this was the birth of Jonty Rhodes. A world Cup moment to savour and a blast from the past indeed

CRIKET WORLD CUP UPDATE

This weekend I ended up going for a spin in a Porshe Camin. Now THAT IS is CLASS. Class is something that stands out, that is unique, that is solid machine designed for success and high performance. Ebie Kop end brought the Porshe to me , I hopped in and it was sheer class.

On the same token, What we seen on the weekend in yellow in Jamaica sticking it to our lads is sheer CLASS. South Africa Choked again. Lost the Plot and just faded away. Even Abu Bakr Marck Boucher coudnt deliver.
The Ozzies are class bouys even if I am a Protea. I recieved alot of sms's and Biggy and Hoosain Mayet agree that Kallis played for his average and not for the team. Ebie though was at my place and said that 40 odd of 60 balls is not that bad. Once again though the Ozzies f$%ked us up when it mattered the most. GUYS YOUR VIEWS on the weekend.

The rest of the results flowed and India can go watch the AIFA awards now and I watched with my toppie last night. We both thought the Bangalees were going to f#$%k it up
But lets here everyones views on the SA vs OZ match. It should make some interesting banter.

BREAKING NEWS

- According to reports Madrid has officially declared interest in Portugese winger Christiano Ronaldo. Utd owes are not commenting. Whats wrong are you maggots scared the owe is going

- Hows that for Roger Federer. He lost his second straight masters against Guilermo Canas. Two straight tournaments in a row. And Federer has lost against the same bloke. But he still is class and he can be beaten


-Check this parade in India. I got this pic from Zam Ram. I agree thats why these Muggs will win League. Take note of the second banner in the float. This must be their fan base in madras

-Now Wayne Rooney and Mclaren are at peace. Come on we all know there is tension. Mclaren has to go. Even Donandoni is feeling the heat in Italy, Especially now with Buffon unlikely to be fit, The Scots will come out busting in Bari. Rather call in Franco Baresi. Now that man was class. In other Soccer news Christiano Ronaldo has stated he wants to play for Man Utd for a LONG TIME. If i was the Lity I would move on to bigger things.

-What a sublime trophy we got for the Best of the Best Fantasy Cricket World Cup Champion. We will also be giving away two sponsored trophies for the Super Striker that finishes Top of the group satge and one for the person that finishes Top of the Super 8's. Next to the trophy is a size 5.soccer ball. So This is a big Bugger. The best of the best Ball trophies are also in So please all owes with outstanding fees. Lets get the ball rolling.

-Thanks Baboo Wadee who logs on from the UK. I got a mail from Baboo and he says the blog keeps him to speed with SA over there. Baboo I hope you went to Anfield as we plan to interview you and hear your ball expereinces over there.

WEEKLY SOCCER ROUND UP

THREE LIONS ON A SHIRT

Azee, hearing the flutes and the Singing seems long gone now. What is wrong with this ba#$trd Mclaren. Honestly what has changed since Erikson has left. The man continues to amaze me really. I jonestly thought that he would make the difference. But replacing Lennon with f$%ken Stuart Downing. What does Downing bring to the England team. I dont understand this oke and his relationship with his Son. England were woeful and Pundits have said time & time Again that You cannot play Gerard and Lampard in the same team. It will be a tragedy if England fail to qualify for Euro 2008. It will be like the Paki's and India failing to qualify for the current Cricket World Cup. But Football is not coming home this time. I think England need to blast Mclaren just for bringing Stuart Downey in place of Lennon.Azee your viwes as a English Fan

England manager Steve McClaren and star striker Wayne Rooney were involved in a dressing-room row after the goalless draw against Israel, according to reports.

The Manchester United forward is said to have walked out of the dressing room after being singled out for criticism by McClaren, whose team have now failed to score in four of their last five matches.
Rooney has failed to score a competitive goal for England since Euro 2004 and McClaren is reported to have told the 21-year-old that he has not played well for his country for three years.
Rooney reportedly responded by throwing his boots and kit at the wall in frustration and it is reported the argument was so loud it could be heard in the Israel dressing room next door.
The former Everton forward endured a frustrating evening, failing to really get into the game and being shown a yellow card after a spat with Bolton defender Tal Ben Haim.

Elsewhere in Qualifiers there were good wins for the Portugese, Germany over Chechkoslovakia away from home. The Spanish had a ood win as well. But with some more fixtures on Wednesday the Big Boys are going to find it difficult

FORZA AZURRI-

A crucial qualifier looms against a Scotland team that has showed real grit and are probably enjoying one of their best qualifying campiagns to date. Its going to be a tough encounter for Donadoni and an Italian Outfit that did not start the campaign as hoped. Del Piero has been called up to the squad and should probably start on the Bench. Cannavaro has not been at his best since he went to the Muggs Madrid. Nesta has been injured. But Italy must win on Wednesday and I have faith that we will put in a display worthy of World Champions and we will ensure that Euro 2008 will not be boring and filled with minnows. If I were Donandoni I would start with Buffon, Grosso, Oddo,Cannavaro, Materazzi, Gatusso,Pirlo, Zambrotta,Camoronesi, De Natale, Toni,

Lets see what happens

Forza Azurri

One Step Closer to Euro 2008

WOZA SA 2010 WOZA

A good win for Bafana against Chad. Even though Pereira has got the result I still think they are paying hime too much. This weekend I ended up chatting to the cabin crew form Emirates Air. A gorgeous hottie from New Zealand and two pilots from Brazil and Holland. Sorts as usual came up. The Brazilian pilot said Periera. Good Thing. The gorgeous air hostess got some flack from me as I stuck it to her regarding South Afircas rivalry with the All Blacks and Ozzies. She explained to me the Haka and its effects.

GREAT MATE!!!! I want a Mauri tatoo now. But Azee its Chad and the mans test is still to come

BABE OF THE WEEK

This weeks babe of the week is Joanna Krupa. SUBLIME

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

I JUST WANT TO TAKE THE TIME TO WISH SOMEONE A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

"Many Percieve that I have lost today,but what it doesnt percieve is what I have found
In the past you have pulled for me on the playing field and in life.You have willed me to succeed sometimes in my lowest moments and I have found generosity in you.
You have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams. Some dreams I could have never reached without you. In the past I have found you and I will take the memory of you with me for the rest of my life"

HEROES ARE REMEMBERED, LEGENDS NEVER DIE
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.HAVE A LOVELY DAY.
JUST THOUGHT I'D PUT THESE VIDEOS FOR YOU


http://www.youtube.com/v/VFHOZ2IiYSc



http://www.youtube.com/v/yHyPeleilFw

NEW CLASSIFIED SECTION

Guys we are developing a CLASSIFIED SECTION ON THE BLOG. I think this would be ideal for a owe selling a phone,car, computer etc.

This section will be situated at the Bottom of the Blog.
A fee of R50 will be charged and the classified ad will be flighted for a month. So basically R50 a month.
The ad will be text only. The Item, Desripton, Price(If applicable) , Contact Details is all that needs to be sent via email.

The blog will have no responsiblity for Shady dealings. We will just flight the ad. So to advertise in the Classified Section or if you owes want to sell something Just email me @ naseem@mweb.co.za. Once your payment is made in my account the advert will be flighted, And well Hopefully your stuff will sell.

In a month we have recieved Over 3000 hits and Im confident that if owes browse around the Classified Section they will find something they Like. But you know the Classifieds always Risky ao advertise at your own peril as the Blog will not accept responsiblity of any sorts wahtsoever. We cant promise any thing as Tricksters Lurk everywhere.

FROM THE KOP END-BREAKING NEWS

On behalf of the Blog and my advisors we would like to Wish Faheem Vahzerz well. The lad has come in for a pasting but has kept the blog alive and because of his condition he is missed on the Blog. The Old Trafford owes have some heart and dont lambast the lad on this post till he gets better at least. But he will be out of action for a while. Well at least when he comes back he will able to see his k#$k comments and the chics in Anfield properly. Good Luck Faheem Vahzerz and Insha-Allah the operation is a success. We send our duas. Azee and Seth We want a response from you owes. Be Gentle but remember when he gets back he is still the Faheem Vahzerz of the Old..

LEGEND THAT SHOOK THE BLOG

I thought It would be apt to put the Legend that shook the blog and Video of the week in one Post. In the week I spoke to Hazrat and we were talking about Waseem Akram as he is a pesonal friend of Hazrat. We talked about that Final in 1992 and the phrase "ALAN LAMB HAS BEEN CLEAN UPPED". What a player Wasim Akram was and there was no better at Reverse swing than this man. Chris Lewis was next to follow and got a first baller with massive swing. Pakistan went on to win the World Cup. The clips after that are of that memorable day in Kingsmead with South Africa chasing and at 150 for 1. And then Waseem & Waqar started what was the greatest exhibition of swing and inswinging yorkers that I have ever seen. It was the Total Power Series. 16 years ago. Doesnt seem like it hey. But Hazrat this video is for you and Waseem Akram was definately a legend that shook the Blog

http://www.youtube.com/v/0I4R9K1HB2g

OPEN THE FLOOR-BETTING -AREH WHAA

Latest: BOB WOOLMER WAS MURDERED

Eish, Lots of stories emerging now about the death of Bob Woolmer. I think after the public holiday we can all enjoy some serious discussion here about the topic. So Zunaid and Riyad Rustenburg and the likes Shove off for this one. Mombhai Il be interested to hear your views since you are a fan of the Pakis.

Last week I wined and dined with a beautiful lass from Chile who in turn wanted to soak up some South African Culture. And no better place than Gold Reef City. Anyways after dinner she wanted to take a walk in the Casino. We ended up at the Roulette table. And there was a massive comotion going on there. There was and Indian Lady, Fat, Make Up, Sarie and alles. So you know me, I went over. Next thing this aunty screams AREH WHA , AREH WHA and she was winning there. She started buying Cola Tonics and toasted cheese for the people next to her. She was screaming "29 and the Neighbours Must fall.AREH WHAH!!!!! and the bloomin thing was falling. She then applied the most common theory in the Book.And I shook my head. She gave the one owe A kLEEPAH. And I tell yo this Char Aunty was winning BIG. My Vrou for the night asked me why is she paying that man and what is AREH WHAH. I said sweety if you want to know how it works log on to www.swoosh0018.blogspot.com/theoryofthekleepah.html. And we left therafter which leads me to this post. True Story I kid you not. Everything on the blog is true

Everytime the Pakis play they are surrounded by controversy and incident. And Always the tag of betting gets attached to them. This year they were no different, A shock loss to Ireland and then rocked by the death of Woolmer. And Now Woolmers death is touted as suspicious and the last thing I heard was Former fast bowler saying that The Pakistani Mafia had something to do with this. Its all in the papers.

Lets be honest guys the theory of the Kleepah Works, Palming works. For those that are new to the blog and dont know whats theory of the kleepah. look at the link on the side.

Now on a small scale what would be the reaction If we applied the theory of the kleepah to Zak Ackals on a busy Saturday night and intstead of giving your chow ahead of the que he makes you hang for over an hour and takes the kleepah. I mean even our own Hansie fell for the Kleepah,

1. What I want to know from the owes is that Is betting Still Rife in the game of Cricket and Is the stakes so High that a persons life can depend on it.Just a general question?

2. Is Betting a phenom in the Sub Continent?

3. Was Woolmers death stress related and was the loss to difficult for him to fathom. Does this coupled with the frenzy and passion of a Cricket mad nation influence the pressure on a coach especially after a loss in a major event which is deemed a tragedy

4. Latest.Was the murder due to betting syndicate or just angry fans dissapointed at losing?

If India lose against Sri Lanka there will be big s$%t. Let me tell you. Those owes will go on the rampage. They already broke down Doni's house after the Bangalees beat them.....



I mean after all the Paki players dont seem to give a s#$t. But all Im saying is Betting the major role player in the Sub Continent and where was Sanjay Guptah Azee. Some of our local toppies at the masjids and shopping centers are already saying that there was betting involved. I dont know its just that this Pakistani World Cup Campaign is just not right. One Toppie called Esoep Bhai who told me he leaves comments as Esoep Bhai Montgommery went to the extent of saying



"NOW THE GAS LEAK IN THE HOTEL..............
I said Esoep Bhai Come Now Come Now.....Lets not get way in over our heads. His response was swift and he refered to the oldest phrase in the book. "Die ander mense maak a plan maar die Charo het die plan"


Then he lit his cosulate and you know that song Snap Back about the Lambo Gallardo ,he was singing." Snap Back, Look at that Charro,look at him driving his Lamborgini Gallardo, "Snap Back....humming in that tone



I know its off the topic but I will open the floor.....

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

"Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's much more serious than that."- Bill Shankly.

BREAKING NEWS

- I update posts daily or as quick as I can So on the posts Breaking News and Cricket World Cup Update there will always be updated articles. Just scroll back for the week and all latest news will be added on the respective articles

-Bob Woolmer has been Murdered.Please leave comments on Open The Floor........

-Rumour is rife that Rafa Benitez is being linked to Real Madrid. From Madrids point of view the man is perfect but will Cisse and the Boys from the Kop relish the man leaving.

-So we all set for a Man Utd vs Chelsea FA Cup Final. The lity Ronaldo scored again. But the talking point is about the Fan that tried to hit Frank Lampard. Thats a bit hectic. If there was a Chelsea guy he wanted to Hit, Zunaid is available

- Ebie Jay must be smiling. A win for Ferrari in the Austrailian Grand Prix. No Shumacher but Kimi did the job. Where was the MUGG Alonso

-Good win for Rafael Nadal at the masters in Indian Wells. It was Nadals first win since the French Open last year.

-Its good to see that the blog readership is evolving overseas. We have owes in London and I got the following email from Ridone in Bahrain

"Salaamz mr mayet
Hope you keeping well.
Just wanted to let you know, reading your blog makes me feel like I am in SA.
Thanks and keep it up.
Ws’salaam
Ridone
Ridwaan Yusuf Patel"

-Apart from Sport did ou guys see Durban Beach Front this morning. Like a mini Tsunami. Scary,Scary. Below is the pic of the Milky lane area, near the pier.



-For those of you in Lenz you will know a lad called Mogamett. Mogamet is the master of the JEDI mind trick. He pulled the JEDI mind trick on me yesterday. I went to Waaris bakery as it was really hot. As I approached the fridge he said to me
"Ay a Cola will go down bra. Its so hot, A coke will taste so lekker. If only i had a coke now my day will go well" And he leans on the fridge just as you about to buy yours.In the end you end up buying two cokes and make for the door quickly.Bottom line Mogamet pulled a JEDI mind trick on me

HITTING YUSUF ABDULLAH OUT OF THE PARK

What a weekend of Sport, Action and tension. On Friday night I was at Sandton Towers at the launch of the Al Nur Insurance Function. After the Function I met Hashim Amla, Ahmed Amla and Yusuf Abdullah who believe it or not played in my Fathers Under 10 team for Soccer back in the day.He was also a good soccer player as I reied to convince the other Dolphins owes.He also was in fact my back neighbour and Cucci's brew. Anyways Yusuf Abdullah had lunch at my place on Sunday and all the guys had a chance to meet him and well pad up and get to face him. I must say I met Yusuf after a long time and Myself, Swaar, Faaiz Oz,My brew,Riyad Loonat,Ebie Ahmed, Shazo, Mamoo and the guys had a lekker chat with Yusuf and got the behind the scenes feel of the Pro 20 etc. Wat a owe. Down to Earth and dinkum.

As I always said on the blog. It is a priviledge and an honour to meet one of our muslim brothers that have made it on the Big Stage. To Play at that level to me is an achievement and I always said that the Swoosh Blog will promote and support our owes to the end. Wats better is that other than Bret Shults we have no left arm swing bowler and Insha-allah Yusuf On behalf of the blog We wish you all the best My man and hope that one day you will reach the pinnacle and the top. Like I said when our muslim owes are out there, Yourself,Hash,Ahmed,Imraan Khan we as a community and as Muslims send our duas and support you owes all he way.

Anyway after the chats I said I have to show the blog that i can wack this left armer out of the yard. The initial plan was to pad up but I opted for the non protective option.
So here was the Action



Yusuf just warming up that left hand and getting ready to send one down



He sent a belter ,I think at 145 km/ph. The speed he usually bowls



You know me being the Image man I had to come out to bat with my Graeme Smith Oakleys and Hash are you watching. Look at the technique.

The ball was gone over the Main Road and into Dr Mamoniats Tennis Court. I think Il stick to Soccer. I didnt even see the freakin thing.

After theat ball I decided to stick to Soccer and Myself and the owes were getting some pointers and taking in some banter.

In the End I said Il do the bowling after the advise and Tips.

So it was indeed an honour to meet the man and Insha-allah We wish you all the success in the future. So on behalf of myslef and the Blog Good Luck to Yusuf,Hash,Ahmed and Imraan Khan and keep the KZN Dolphins flag flying Boys...

Swoosh

PS.And I even collected one in the Ribs.

pictures courtesy of our cameraman on the job. Yusuf "The Swaar" Kadwa

THE LITY IS NOW THE BEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD

THEATER OF DREAMS

I was at Hazrat Yusuf Rasool on Saturday afternoon, busy taking out a contract. For those of you who tried phoning me I apologised as my phone got stolen underneath the Palm Trees in Sandton. But Hazrat will have me on line by tomorrow.

Hazrat is now advertising with me as of next month and Thanks Hazrat. Hazrat Yusuf Rasool owns the Vodacom 4 U in Cresta and If you owes are in the need of Vodacom Contracts, Acessories and all other related Cell Phone Stuff. This is the man to contact. There were some class phones on display and I got a class deal from the man. His advert and details will be flighted shortly so This is the Man for Vodacom Contracts.
Anyways I was watching the game on the PLASMA at Hazrat and UTD Fans were coming in by the Dozens, looking at the screen and gloating. Hazrat being a Utd Fan was lambasting me.
Bolton whom I believed will deliver failed again. But Utd as I said Its sad to admit but they are playing that UTD Football. They are going to be difficult to stop. And that lity Christiano Ronaldo had a cracker. Apparantly he is the Best pLayer in the World now, according to some MUGGS. He is good but he is not the best. But a great win Biggy,Seth,Azee,Hoosain,Hazrat...

CHELSKI
Sustaining the pressure. A good 3-0 win but as I said above. Its going to be tough. Reports are rife Linking Jose and Frank Lampard to Madrid. For now the only news at the bridge is Roman is divorced and is checking Marat Safins ex chic

GUNNERS POINT OF VIEW.

Watched the game with Faaiz the Arsenal man and the man was in the perishaans again saying that Next year we will rebuild and we getting Frank Ribery and we will be better. Ya Ya. The stinkers Arsenal conceded in stopage time. Wengers daughter gets married in two weeks and I think thats why the dip in form

FROM THE KOP END

Pakistan=Liverpool=Inconsistant=Once were a great team

According to Goolams Law of astrophysics above Liverpool pulled out a draw. Its a Dog Fight for third and fourth and where is Cisse, Vis Ebie Kop End, Fahhem Vahzerz. These owes are scarce.

The only thing now that will benchmark the season is f$%king Utd up in Europe, probably the Final

EUROPEAN ROUND UP

Good wins around Europe for all the big Guns. Barcelona, Inter, Ac Milan.And yes Real Madrid. I saw Riyad walking around in his Madrid top this weekend so something different and good Zikr this week.

Losses though for Bayern Munich who are fourth and Valencia.

LOCAL SCENE

Pirates dumped out of the Absa Cup on penalties. Why does this sound so familiar. Our owes cannot kick penalties

FORZA JUVE

We play tonight and after Napoli and the other Muggs had results that suit us Descamps ordered no complacency and stamp of authority is much needed.

CRICKET WORLD CUP UPDATE

What a week of Cricket. But first we reflect on the tragic loss of Bob Woolmer and the Pathetic exit of Pakistan in One Day Crickets Greatest Show piece But Jayasuriya Soldiers On.

-Now I heard some banter about the Pakistani Mafia and stuff like that. Hectic Patric Hectic. Can you just imagine if India lose. There will be riots. Back to Cricket and how was the Sri Lankan performance. Jayasuriya keeps on going. This must be his hundreth World Cup. Things are hotting up now and good wins for the other teams
Is winning and shouldering responsibility or burden of a passionate nation too much too handle. What I mean is that the Paki loss must have created Mayhem in the streets of Pakistan. Its a Tragedy. I want the comments from the Big Guns here. Its just sad to see Woolmer gone in this manner. Collapsed in his room. Was it stress or shouldering the burden of a great cricketing nation dumped out by Ireland. Watever the man had a lot to offer to the cricketing world and at 58 its a sad loss to the sport. He did wonders for SA.

Which takes us to point #2. Mombhai and Hazrat, PAKISTAN DUMPED OUT AGAINST MINNOWS LIKE IRELAND. Come on it was a woeful performance. How could they be dismissed so easily and so cheap. They have themselves to blame and no one else. It was pathetic. Pakistan going home in the group stages and losing against the Irish on Saint Patrics day. No disrespect to the Irish as they came out for it but once again Pakistan etch themselves into World Cup folklaw. Losing to Ireland and getting bowled out under 150 against Ireland.

Then How was the Bangalees against India. Bitchara's, Bangalees. What a victory against a cricketing powerhouse. India are now in danger of exiting the World Cup. But what a performance from the 17 year old lity. Mamad Tamim. To come out against a quality attack and f$4k them Up. Al Makah was skitting at 2 in the morning in Fordsburg. They were giving out free Chicken Bhoti Kebaabs and Rogni Naan.I phoned Hoosain Mayet. Ebie Jay phoned me, My cricketing analyst Mr AK Kadwa (Father of Swaar) an avid cricketing enthusiast was shocked at the dominance of the Bangalees. But what a night for Bangladesh,The Takahs, and Al Makah. Hazrat now you had to go to Bangladesh....

The rest of the Big Guns cruised through and How was Hershille Gibbs against the Dutch. Six Six's in one over. Ebie Jay the die hard Cricketing SA Fan and one of my reporters on the scene kept sms'ng me the updates while I was at the Al Nur function. His take was that no matter who the opposition is it is still difficult to hit six six's in one over. What do you owes think. Is it a greta achievement or was it the Dutch.But a good win for SA. Then again its only the Dutch. Oh yes and how was Abu Bakr Marc Bouchers fastest 50. I tell you there are some good wickees in the tournament and most of them are on Song

FANTASY CRICKET WORLD CUP

After a Interesting weekend of World Cup Cicket and the end of the 1st Round of fixtures. Things are not as eay as they seem I guess. We find an unexpected leader of the standings and a true gentleman Ridwaan Mayet. This man has not surrendered his lead. As expected Firaz is in second I have to hand it to this tactician Herbly. He had the faith to stick with Gibbs even when Gibbs is playing in Jamaica. The man is a Jackal

Here is the top 10. And we have a Pommy in the top 10 and Jozie you know what they say about peaking early.

1 Ridwaan Mayet ridszzzz 1084
2. Firaz Ahmed Tops 11 985
3. Hoosain Mayet Sir Donald Herbly 891
4. Muhammed Carim MC's Eleven 889
5. Riaz Ismail Pops World 11 883
6 ebrahim loonat Jungli Jaanwar Barmy Army 880
7 Yusuf Maiter The Kings 11 879
8. Ebrahim Ahmed Pirates of da Caribbean 841
9. naeem mahomed The Ganja Pirates XI 813
10. Yousuf Kadwa Eye See Sea Breezers 803

BEST OF THE BEST FANTASY LEAGUE

I see Seth is opening up a lead as we wind down in April. But still obviously plenty to play for. I find myself dropping to 17 position can you believe. That is the second half of the table. And Swaar leads my by three points. But Im still ahead of Ebie J.Here is the top ten

1.Zumba Bumba's Yusuf Seth 58 1637
2. MCFC Muhammed Carim 49 1576
3. Pops f.c. Riaz Ismail 82 1570
4. blue angels basheera loonat 61 1536
5. Herbly Utd Hoosain Mayet 54 1520
6. Biggy's Boys Moosa Dangor 53 1520
7. luckyokes ridwaan patel 67 1493
8. J BOYZ Yusuf Mayet 61 1443
9. merchoes11 mohamed motala 79 1433
10. GALACTICOS suhail gani 57 1420

BABE OF THE WEEK

This weeks Babe of the Week is Jessica Alba. What a piece. A badaam if I do say so myself. watched her in some dancing movie a while back.

MUGG OF THE WEEK

I know Im going to get lamabasted for this weeks choice. Then again some of you might agree with me and some not.




to coach your national team 1.4 million
bustle and bazzle in traffic to training in Sandton R300
A superb life R20000 A day

Drawing 1-1 against Swaziland The man is the Mugg of the Week.

I said it before 1.4 Million a month. That is crazy for any coach. It is crazy to pay that kind of money to anybody that coaches Bafana. What do we expect that money to make us World Champions. The Man couldnt do it for Brazil with World Stars at his disposal and we expect him to do it here. How, When ,Who. look im not saying he is a bad coach but he doesnt deserve to be paid that Much.

Azee I know you will have a fat lot to say, But What about Gordon Ingesund. He would have did it for a tenth of the money. His proved it in domestic competition. Like we said for England, Boot Sven and take a English owe. They have the heart. Ingesund will have the heart like Barker did. But then again Maybe Jomo will come in at the death and take over.

Its like you get a bra that goes up to a chic, tites her. Does all the ground work. the twisting,the roses, the endless and tireless phone calls. Then after all the blood sweat and tears as he is about to get it right He is replaced. Oh What a feeling...........The owe Jomo Just drives the car after that.....
Its like I got a chic, A owe called Naved Ul Hasan pulls a Jomo on me. So the owes say that Naved Ul Hassen pulled a Jomo On a Swoosh. A while later Biggy knocks Naved Ul Hassen. The owes will say that Biggy pulled a Jomo On Hassen who pulled a Jomo on a Swoosh......and it goes on until you get the chain pulled a Jomo on a Jomo on a Jomo on a Jomo. Guy does all the graaf and in the end Jomo comes roaring in and roar he does

So will Jomo pull a Jomo on Pareira lets see. But for the draw against Swaziland and getting a propesterous amount of money makes Our Bafana Coach the MUGG OF THE WEEK

LEGENDS THAT SHOOK THE BLOG

I was speaking to Cisse the other night and he again lambasted me for not having a post, Legends That Shook the Blog. So we will bring it back again and hopefully continue it weekly. Lately Everything has been Man Utd so I feel it fitting that a legend actually stems from there

Hoosain Mayet an, avid Man Utd Fan on the blog chatted to me a while back. He was reading Fergusons Biogaphy and in so many words he told me about one part. It was Inter Milan vs Man Utd, At the San Siro, The year of the Treble. Fergsons lities travelled to Italy for the second leg against Inter. Beckham and Simeone (Argentina) still had tension. Fergusons lities were still young and what daunting task than the Guiseppe Miaza in Milan. In the tunnel the Inter Players were screaming and Simeone in particular was trying to rattle the Utd Young Guns with war chants and antics. Sir Alex Fergurson said something to this effect. "My Lities were rattled, AND THEN CAME PETER SHMEICHEL FROM THE BACK, HE MADE HIS PRESENCE FELT AND THE WALLS OF THE SAN SIRO BEGAN TO THUNDER, and the Inter Players were Shut...................

Such was the effect of the Great Dane in Utd's Reign as Champions. Oh I remember he pulled Utd out of s#$e on his own on countless occasions. Please Utd Fans admit it openly on the Blog that this man was partly responsible for many of your accolades. He rarely made a mistake, was aforce of note and a keeper anyone would not refuse. He was burly and Intimidating. I sa if it wasnt for him Man UTD would........F$%K IT,let me not upset them But the Great Dane indeed gets my vote as A LEGEND THAT SHOOK THE BLOG

Cricket World Cup Update

IM A PROTEA

Andre Nel seems to be in good spirits ahead of the clash against the Dutch tomorrow. However the slanging match between the Ozzies and the South Africans brewed up again with Mcgrath saying that the South Africans are chokers and cant handle pressure. Ntini will miss the first game but South Africa should progress easily tomorrow and its about winning the group at this stage and beating the Ozzies for that mental satisfaction

AUSTRAILIA VS SCOTLAND

Not that we expected anything different but the Ozzies were their rutless usual self. People probably percieve these games as a waste but its good for players scoring and getting fine tuned for the World Cup. Like Ponting now for instance. He is on his bicycle and starting to ride.

KENYA VS CANADA

Was Seth playing for Canada. Azee sms'd me last night and asked me if I picked Steve Tikolo in my fantasy team. I told him Watch Kenya. They are going to spring some surprises

West Indies vs Pakistan

I knew it, The Pakis have shed their thumbprint on the World Cup. I sms'sd Mombhai last night and lambasted him. I watched a bit of the game at Swaar and we had supper with Hash, Hoosain Mayet,Ebie J and a few lads. Hash of course in town for the Pro 20. But the opening game is down and I dont know what to make of it. Il await the response from the Cricketing owes. But Never Underestimate a host Nation. I thought the Pakis fielded terribly and I was expecting West Indies to make about 220.

Lara, Watch him. This will be his swansong. But a match the Paki's should have won. Mombhai your owes will not go far. Theres something lacking in the Paki Outfit. Lets see what happens tonight

VIDEO OF THE WEEK

In my time I have sported alot of haircuts. I tried the Mohawk, The shaven, the Alice Band. I always obviously went to the Salons because of teh chicks. Now the women in the Salons have their own banter. Lets not get into that. In Shapers I could never understand but it was probably lekker banter.

But the barbershop banter about boxing from this Clip. Sublime

Herbly and Swaar this is for you. Enjoy

And His Mama called him Clay but Il call him the greatest boxer ever Mohammed Ali

OPEN THE FLOOR

The World Cup starts today and I have been reading alot about how stadiums are not still completed. Any World Cup is a massive sporting event as well as an economic thrust for any host nation.

In the West Indies there has been alot of talk regarding the condition of the pitches. Yesterdays practise had to be moved because because of Nets not being up to scratch. South Africa vs Pakistan was largely attributed to a horrible pitch.

I ask you owes before the World Cup Starts. Will this be a factor in the forthcoming matches. Will the pitches swing the balance of the ties and make minnows like Bangladesh into Warriors. I mean the last thing we want to hear is Souh Africa played Holland and the pitch was terrible for the team batting second etc.

I think a host nation needs to have things like this checked before any major event.I mean not having stadiums ready is PROPOSTEROUS. How was the opening ceremony by the way

So I open the floor.

1. Are these pitches stuffed and in terrible condition?

2. Will or can they have an impact in important matches?

Also guys how are the times for viewing pleasure. Tonites gane starts in the evening. Is this a day game or a day nighter.

3. Or am I just talking shit$ and there is nothing to worry about really

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

I was at Nando's Randburg last night and I bumped into a supporter from Old Trafford. I could just see the guy was a Man Utd Supporter. I had my Del Piero Italy kit on, whats new, and we began talking. This was the mans exact words. I cant mention his name because the Kop owes will slay him.

"I met a man the other day who told me he met the white PELE. I asked the man WHO is he,
he said
"He goes by the name of Wayne Rooney!"-Anonymous

I had no comment and walked away...................................Wayne Who?

BREAKING NEWS

-Frank Lampard is reportedly a Juventus target and reports are flying around Spain, as well as all the Spanish newspapers that the Lity Christiano Ronaldo will be a Real Madrid Player next season

-Bernie Ecclestone now wants to stage more races in Formula One and hold night races as well as a flood lit race. Would be good to see Shumi racing around Select going Hun Hun, even though he is retired.

-I always told Azee that Berbatov was class ever since he Sunk Utd when he played for Leverkusen. The man has sent Spurs through to the quarters in the UEFA CUP. Well done Bergson

-London - Roman Abramovich, the multi-billionaire Russian owner of London's Chelsea Football Club, has divorced his wife Irina, Abramovich's spokesperson said on Tuesday.
The pair "divorced in Russia on a consensual basis and have agreed terms in respect of arrangements for their children and a financial settlement," his spokesperson John Mann said.
Mann added that Abramovich's "corporate interests, including Chelsea Football Club" would not be affected by the proceedings.
Last week, Forbes magazine ranked former oil magnate Abramovich as the 16th-richest man in the world, with a personal wealth of an estimated $18.7bn.
The couple have five children.
He is also governor of Chukotka, a remote and bitterly cold region in east Russia across the Bering Strait from Alaska.
Orphaned in childhood, Abramovich, 40, was born in the Volga River town of Saratov. Any Chics Interested

-I dont know if many of you heard 94.7 this morning and the zulu pronounciation thing going on with everything starting with e. I made my own one. Remember South Africa's introduction to the World Cup in France 98. Piere Isa from Marseile changed the game against France....

"Knock Knock"
Whos there?
"Isa"
Isa Who
E sa penalty

"Knock Knock"
Whos there?
"Isa"
Isa Who
E sa nather penalty

"Knock Knock"
Whos there?
"Isa"
Isa Who
E sa Own Goal

-Gentleman,

McLaren runs a Grand Prix League on their website... Sort of like a Dream league. Anyone interested, register a team by clicking on the link below then mail me your team name (Case specific) and I'll add you into the mini league that I've created.

Arshaad.Moosa@za.verizonbusiness.com

Regards,
Arshaad Moosa
So any Formula one fans if you want to join Ary Moosa's league for fantasy formula one here is the link
McLaren.com

-Fabio Cannavaro is unhappy at Madrid. AC Milan are reortedly chasing both Cannavaro and Buffon. Fabio has to leave the hoodoo stricken Madrid. Ever since Del Bosque ledt the last great player has been Fernando Hierro. Look at Roberto Carlos and Helguera, a Shadow of what they once were

-Old Trafford boasts a host of stars tonight for Man Utd vs European x11. Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, Robinho, Italian World Cup Stars, Gerard. Zidane however has declined not to play alongside Matterazi

-Sorry Azee & Seth. My condolences after the Lions defeat this weekend. The Sharks continue their impressive run and the Durban owes are only jolling at Tilt because of this phenomina. What goes up must come down lads.

- Roger Federer is out of the Indian Wells Masters Event. Yes believe it or not he has been beaten by Wild Card Guilemo Canas. This proves that we are all human at the end of the day. Still being a tennis player I have never seen anyone in the class of Federer. The man's game is Complete. And what a backhand.

-The Opening Ceremony of the Cricket World Cup got underway to a pure Carribian theme. The hype is over and now its time to separate the men from the Boys.

-Our Fantasy Cricket World Cup is on the rise. We have gone up to 23 players now and Yeah, Its a heavy shooting draw there....Its going to be exciting. We got entrees from as far as Cape Town and London so its going to be Tops to see who the Best is......